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My dearest

By: SSR (School of Mechanical, Aerospace and Civil Eng.)
Competition Year: 2017
Votes (1) | Comments (0)
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My dearest,

I could write an ode as to what woman are
But there are not enough trees in all the world to give me paper to write what women are
We are books discarded at the back of libraries, filled with men who have been read and re-read and passed down for generations whilst women are covered in dust with their spines broken and the covers dishevelled
Books we may be
But the stories we have to tell are written in the way we walk
When we walk tall and proud
We are picking ourselves up and brushing the dust off our jackets
When we learn and read and pick up wisdom from other books
We are building other women up to be more than what the world sees
We are not time
Time who pulls us backward and drags our jumpers forward to try and teach us a lesson
Time that likes to remind you even when you want nothing more than life itself to forget
Time who sets in and likes to prod people to remember the good old days when men were mightier and women were damsels in folklore
Time is dragging our names through the dirt

To the Brown girl in PE who wears long trousers because she has to hide the hair on her legs because her mother won't let her shave
To the girl plucking chin hairs in the bathroom mirror and thinks she is repulsive
To the girl with the monobrow, they will be a trend soon and you will wear yours better than anyone else
To the girl with big lips and crooked teeth, do not hide your smile behind your lips
Your eyes may wrinkle when you smile, but they glow brighter than anyone has ever seen
To the girl with the cackle and pop laugh
When you snort and cry till your belly aches, you fill the room with light and make people smile with you, not at you
To the girl scared to wear anything less than a turtle neck
Your flesh was kissed by gods and smothered with honey and caramel
Wear it with pride and stand in line with your brothers and sisters who live in fear, for you are not alone
To the girl who hides behind straightened hair dampened by chemicals
Your hair was woven to protect your irreplaceable mind
Each strand of dark night
Each curl looped across your forehead
And each wave tucked behind your ear was designed for you
Tailor made to belong to you and only you

To the boy who who decided he needed my attention
I am not sorry I never gave it to you
And to the girl after me
You were the girl before, during and after me
So I pray he is nicer to you than he ever was to me

To my father
Who tried so hard but just ended up tired
You are so strong for doing that
But you are not alone and I cannot leave you
To my mother,
You tried,
And you are trying,
And you will try,
And you are so strong for doing that,
But you do not have to hide behind a rose tinted greenhouse
You do not need to reflect what you think the world wants to see

To my younger self, I wish I could shake you and say you are not worthy of their time
You are not ugly because your worth is more than your exterior no matter who has something to say about it
And one day you will see those boys from Year 10 and you will laugh because they cannot take anything walkway from you anymore
And those girls, the ones who used to bully you, they will cry on your shoulder at graduation and you will tell them you are pleased they have come so far from those days and you wish them the best
You will learn that no matter who says you are too hairy, too Brown, too bold, you are loved every day of your life even if they cannot show it
And one day you will learn to love yourself in leaps and bounds

To my baby
Out there floating
I used to believe babies came from God who plucked them out of their cots in the clouds and lay them down in mother's bellies
So to my baby up there
I only want you to be here when the Anti Christ does not sit in Washington DC
When you will never know what it is to be scared to go through security
When you will be able to be your truest self without being in harm's way
But if I should have you before
I want you to know I will be the hands you use to stop yourself from falling
I will be the book you read to learn a lesson
I will be the chair you sit in to ease yourself of weary days
And I will be the eyes that see your warmth and radiance and tell you every day, you are the star of your own shampoo commercial
Because you are worth it

With love from,

The woman who learns the hard way
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