The Poisoning of G.sulf

By: Sul Mulroy (School of Earth and Environmental Sciences)
Competition Year: 2016
Votes (3) | Comments (0)
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Geobacter, Geobacter,
Here I am
Your cruel exactor,
Forcing you, without a fight,
To make me bio-magnetite.

You see it’s you who’ll work
(To death, maybe)
And I’ll stand and watch,
The show is free.

Open your nucleus and I will inspire,
With the truth,
Of how you’ll expire:

I’ll catch you snoozing,
So carefree,
In warm storage
(30 degrees),
Only now you’ve got to wake up,
And see the fucking woods for the trees!

This relationship between us two,
Is a complex one at best,
The scientist and the microbe,
One puts the other to the test,
One’s gram negative and tiny,
A mighty mineral distiller,
The other,
(Late-log phase)
Becomes a sociopathic killer.

Yes, my poor, dear Geobacter,
I must play the malefactor,
Here’s some cobalt
Open wide!
Get this toxic shit inside!
(It’s a truth serum for raw knowledge you know,
For Geobacter’s truths about Co).

Sorry, sorry Geobacter,
I guess that cobalt was a factor,
In slowing your reduction rate,
Oh right,
I guess it wasn’t to your taste,
It’s all for science my good friend,
What’s that you say? When will it end?
Not yet, keep calm, I’ve got some questions,
So keep respiring, it’s time to listen.

Listen, little Geobacter,
Tell me now, are you the master
Of cycling metals in the ground?
And how long have you been around?

Who helped you,
When in Cuba,
You occupied the laterite?
And when did you first decide
Eat ferrics, shit ferrites?

You are ubiquitous
And resilient
And your impetus to reduce is, quite simply, brilliant
And I must admit, Geobacter,
You really do have a knack for,
Rocking pink and smelling better,
Than your cousin Shewanella,
(For which I am wholly glad,
Shewanella smells fucking bad)
But it’s sad because although the two of us have had a blast,
Is your last.

Yes I know Geobacter,
You’re a reliable contractor,
It’s too late though
(For this batch)
I’ve already revealed to you the catch
There was cobalt in that iron sandwich
And now while I watch you languish,
Your every move will start to make up,
Some hot, fresh scientific data,
And then I’ll pour you down the sink,
But it really isn’t what you think.

It’s just Geobacter, me and you,
We have got some work to do
And remember it’s your lines I read,
So watch out next time when you feed!
Because I’ll stop poisoning you and your brothers,
When the meal reviews read, ‘No, not bothered.’
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